Say Please and Thank You! Why Teaching Polite Expressions Matters

Say Please and Thank You! Why Teaching Polite Expressions Matters

There’s something heartwarming about hearing a child say “please” when asking for something and “thank you” when receiving it. Those words carry much weight—they signal respect, gratitude, and an understanding of social kindness. But let’s be honest, getting kids to use them consistently? That can feel like convincing a cat to take a bath.

Still, teaching polite expressions isn’t just about good manners—it’s about nurturing empathy, fostering positive social interactions, and setting children up for lifelong success.

More Than Just Words—Why Politeness Matters

Sure, “please” and “thank you” seem small, but they’re powerful tools for building relationships. When kids use these words, they’re not just being polite; they’re learning how to communicate respect and appreciation.

Imagine this: Your child asks a friend for a turn on the swing without saying “please.” The friend hesitates. But when the same request comes with a warm “please,” it’s an invitation rather than a demand. That’s social magic at work.

And “thank you”? It’s more than an automatic response; it’s an acknowledgment that someone has done something kind. That kind of recognition strengthens bonds, encourages generosity, and reinforces the idea that kindness is worth celebrating.

When Should Kids Start Learning Polite Expressions?

Earlier than you think! Even babies can pick up on social cues. While they may not say the words yet, they can respond to the tone and rhythm of polite speech. Using sign language is an excellent way to introduce manners early, allowing infants and toddlers to communicate their needs before they can verbally express them.

Here’s a simple guide:

  • Infants (0-12 months): Expose them to polite speech by modeling it yourself. Say “thank you” when they hand you a toy and “please” when offering something. Introduce sign language for manners, such as signing “please” by moving a flat hand in a circular motion on the chest and “thank you” by touching the fingers to the chin and moving them outward.
  • Toddlers (1-3 years): Encourage them to repeat simple polite words or use signs. Even if it’s a mumbled “peez” for “please” or a tiny hand motion for “thank you,” they’re getting the hang of it.
  • Preschoolers (3-5 years): This is the golden age for manners! Kids at this stage understand cause and effect—if they say “please,” they’re more likely to get what they want. Reinforce this with gentle reminders and praise when they remember.

How Sparkles! Encourages Politeness in the Classroom

Social etiquette and politeness are not a lesson but a daily practice. Teachers model polite language throughout the day so children understand that kind words translate into action.

Here’s how we reinforce these habits:

  • Morning greetings: Every day starts with a warm “good morning” and a reminder to use polite expressions throughout the day.
  • Role-playing activities: We create fun scenarios where children practice asking for things politely and expressing gratitude.
  • Manners moments: Teachers make a point to acknowledge and celebrate when children use polite words naturally—sometimes with stickers, but always with encouragement!
  • Storytime and discussions: Books and storytelling help children see politeness in action, sparking conversations about why it matters.
  • Peer reinforcement: Kids love to remind each other about using “please” and “thank you,” making it a classroom-wide effort.
  • Sign language integration: We introduce simple signs for “please” and “thank you” to help younger children and nonverbal learners express politeness.

Leading by Example—Because Kids Copy Everything You Do

Let’s be real — kids are watching us all the time. They pick up our habits, both good and bad. So, if we want them to use polite expressions naturally, we must model them ourselves.

Try this:

  • When asking your child for something, say “please.”
  • Thank them for little things—putting away toys, finishing their meal, or giving a hug.
  • Show appreciation to others in their presence. If they see you thanking a cashier or using kind words with family members, they’ll be more likely to do the same.

It’s less about telling them to be polite and more about showing them how politeness fits into everyday life.

Making It Fun—Because Drills and Lectures Don’t Work

No child wants to hear a long-winded speech about why “thank you” is important. Instead, make it engaging!

Playful prompts:

  • Role-playing games: Pretend to be at a restaurant and have your child “order” their meal using polite words.
  • Manners jar: Fill a jar with stickers or small rewards whenever they use polite expressions without being reminded.
  • Storytime with a twist: Read books highlighting kindness and politeness, then pause and ask, “What could they say here to be polite?”
  • Sign language games: Encourage toddlers to use sign language for manners by turning it into a fun gesture game.

Navigating the Tricky Situations

Of course, there will be times when kids resist. Maybe they refuse to say “please” because they’re frustrated or tired. Or maybe they say “thank you” in a way that sounds more like a grumble than genuine gratitude.

Here’s what to do:

  • Stay patient. Sometimes, kids are just not in the mood, and that’s okay. Instead of forcing it, gently encourage them.
  • Give them time. If they forget, don’t immediately correct them in front of others. Instead, take a moment later to remind them how nice it feels when someone thanks them.
  • Explain the “why.” Instead of “Because I said so,” try “People feel good when we thank them—it’s a way of showing we care.”

The Lasting Power of Politeness

It might sound little, but making children say “please” and “thank you” is not just a piece of etiquette; it’s a way to raise kind, considerate, and socially aware human beings. And the best part is that these little habits, once inculcated, remain with them for life.

At Sparkles!, we see daily how these small acts of politeness form confident, caring children. So keep at it. Keep modeling, keep encouraging, and keep celebrating the little wins. One day, when your child thanks someone with genuine warmth, you’ll know all those reminders were worth it.

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